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Finding it Hard to Forgive?

Hello beautiful soul!

When you decide to forgive, you reclaim your peace of mind when something has happened to disturb you. 

You always have the choice of whether to respond to these hurts and conflicts with anger and bitterness or with forgiveness.

Forgiving is not the same as forgetting. It does not mean that you have to pretend that what happened in the past never happened, but it allows you to let go of the destructive attitudes towards the past that imprison you and/or the person who harmed you in a cycle of anger, guilt and shame.

When your desire for peace is stronger than the anger, disappointment or pain you feel, then forgiveness offers the opportunity to make a new start.

Let Go of the Past with The Ho’oponopono Mantra

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian healing technique of letting go of past issues that you are holding on to and that are still affecting you.

It is a self-help tool that removes self-limiting beliefs, doubts, anger and hate, and fears from your mind. It does so by replacing those thoughts with feelings of faith, trust, and above all, love.

Ho’oponopono is a mind and energy cleanse. You are cleaning your past, letting go of burdens that are preventing you from living the life that you desire. 

If I was asking you whether you prefer to live in the past or to focus on your present…what would your answer be? The thing is, nobody wants to live in the past, especially if it was painful. Taking the step to let go of it is like stepping into the unknown, which can be scary and makes us feel vulnerable.

Letting go and move forward takes courage, energy and commitment and you can definitely do it if you want to! 

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself!

The Ho’oponopono Mantra

The Hawaiian word comes from ho‘o (“to make”) and pono (“right”). The repetition of the word pono means “doubly right” or being right with both yourself and others. 

The aim of the Ho’oponopono Mantra is for you to clear up any negative energy so that you can stop attracting similar experiences into your life.

When you are ready, make a decision and set the intention to forgive. Deciding to forgive involves an act of mercy toward yourself. 

When we offer this mercy, we deliberately reduce resentment, and, instead, offer kindness and compassion.


Make a list of all the situations that are still arising guilt, shame, anger, or/and fear, no matter how small or big they are.

You can ask yourself:

How much pain do I have regarding 'this situation'’?

Why do I feel angry? Why do I feel resentful? Why am I in pain? Why do I feel guilty? Why do I feel ashamed? Why do I carry these negative feelings towards myself? Why do I carry these feelings towards somebody else?

Once you have written your list, go back and re-read each situation, recognise that what happened was not okay, and allow yourself to feel any negative emotions that come up.

Feeling these emotions is a powerful way to discover what you need to release.

(Please be aware that in order to clear negative emotions and hurt from the past, you may have to relive them, so please don’t do this practice if you are not 100% ready).

How to use Ho'oponopono

Once you have written the forgiveness list, read each situation and repeat the following mantra (for each of them):

Please forgive me.

I am sorry.

Thank you.

I love you.

 

What does the mantra mean?

PLEASE FORGIVE ME

When you say those words, you get in touch with your deepest feelings and wounds compassionately. You are forgiving yourself for allowing this to affect you. You are basically expressing the fact that you no longer wish to suffer from a current or past problem. The only person you can change is yourself.

I AM SORRY

When you say ‘I am sorry’, you allow your body to let go of any emotions that you have been holding onto for so long so that they will no longer bother you. It is a simple statement to accept that a problem exists and that you own part of it. When you own the problem fully, you are empowered to make a change with humility recognising that you are human, too!

THANK YOU

Thank you for all the lessons that this situation taught me. (There is always a lesson to be learnt). 

I LOVE YOU

This is about universal love, the love and peace that can be found in the present moment. You are sending love to the situation that will allow you to heal and get through it. Say I LOVE YOU to your body and mind.

Say it over and over. Mean it. Feel it. There is nothing as powerful as Love.

When to use Ho’oponopono

  • When you find yourself thinking negative thoughts
  • When something makes you feel bad and sad.
  • Anytime you get triggered
  • When someone says something hurtful to you
  • When you feel unworthy of being loved
  • When you craving love for yourself
  • When you want to be validated by others
  • When you find it hard to forgive others
  • When you feel resentful towards yourself and others

When you become right with yourself, you become right with others. This is key to creating positive changes in your life. Every day we are given the choice to either keep feeling stuck or to move forward. 

If you are ready to break the negativity cycle and would like someone to support and help you to shift your mindset, you can check the remote healing sessions I offer here.

Love, Carlotta

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